While the application shows promise, there are a few things that either didn't quite meet our standards, were lacking, or incorrect. Fortunately we feel that this can be easily revised. Here are our concerns:

We only need a sample that meets the "show use of emotion" requirement. It can be a small paragraph and doesn't have to be too in-depth—just enough to show that you have a grasp of the game's setting.

Please submit your revisions as its own comment in reply to this one. You have one week to submit the revisions, otherwise we will consider it a revocation of your application. If you have any questions or concerns, ask away!