While the application shows promise, there are a few things that either didn't quite meet our standards, were lacking, or incorrect. Fortunately we feel that this can be easily revised. Here are our concerns:

For the Personality section, we would like for you to expand more about his development from his life before and after Blackwatch. Given how large of a transition that is, what is currently given seems too sparse. Discussing his relationships with others would help flesh things out as well.

Please submit your revisions as its own comment in reply to this one. You have one week to submit the revisions, otherwise we will consider it a revocation of your application. If you have any questions or concerns, ask away!